I like fish. I enjoy crustaceans. I LOVE scampi.
I also like lemon. In tea. In sweets. In cakes and biscuits.
Now something bugs me. Lemons grow on trees. Trees on the ground. Not under the sea.
Why is it that every time I have a nice piece of fish, some juicy prawns or my favourite, crunchy scampi, some fecking idiot has to plonk a massive chunk of lemon in the middle of it?
So we’re supposed to squeeze your lemon over the fish. I know that. And although it’s not exactly my thing, I agree that lemon does work ok with fish. So offer us a bottle of lemon juice with the meal, like the salt, pepper or vinegar. Don’t just shove a huge wedge on the plate, leaving it to bleed juice – and flavour – out onto the meal. Even if I did want to squeeze it, there’s still the issue of the pips that will invariably fall out into your food. Euch.
Please stop it.