Hey, I got my new shoes on…

Paolo Nutini may be Scottish (just ask Stephanie, she knows that) but he’s still right about one thing: there’s something deeply satisfying about wearing a new pair of shoes. Have you ever noticed how you just can’t wait to put them on as soon as you’re out of the shop, even if you’re in the most awkward of places, or they’re totally inappropriate for your outfit?

My faithful old pair of Sensible Work Shoes™ had been showing signs of fatigue for a while, and on Friday morning, they finally gave that ultimate sigh of despair. The sole started peeling off at the front. So with Friday being early leaving day, I decided to pop into town and buy myself some new shoes.

Ordinarily, I hate shoe shopping. I can already hear Emily gasping in disbelief that such a thing could be possible, but I’m afraid it is. I don’t hate shoes, in fact I am rather interested in fashion in general, it just doesn’t like me back. I love fashion in the same way that a man with no legs may love the Tour de France. It doesn’t really matter what garment I’m shopping for, I’m always the wrong shape or size for the basic range. All the way to hats, gloves, bracelets, necklaces… I think the only thing I can always find in my size is a pair of earrings.

Thankfully, unlike the French, people in the UK, and Ireland by retail extension, seem to be a little more aware that not everybody can fit into a size 6 bikini and a pair of ridiculously skimpy stilettos. This means there is at least one shop on the average high street where I can actually buy nice clothes and shoes that fit. So off I trotted to Evans, and I managed to reach the shoe section in the basement without picking up more than 3 other things that I hadn’t planned on buying.

I looked around at the Sensible Shoes, trying desperately to ignore the stupidly beautiful dressy heels that would break my back and the sparkly pumps that I would never actually wear. I spotted a couple of Not-Too-Frumpies, and asked for my size. One was a little too low-cut, I hate getting my toes rained on. The other was only available in tan. Over my dead body! Then I spotted them. A quirky little range, available in black, red or tan, with a slightly unusual design and flower shapes on the sole. In fact screw the rest, flowers on the soles!! I would be leaving flowery footprints wherever I went! Oh. My. God!

I asked the sales lady for my size and she came back with a pair of red shoes, they were out of black. Would I prefer tan? What part of “Over my dead body” did she not get the first time? Dammit, red it would be! I went straight to the checkout, only stopping to pick up another couple of things I hadn’t planned on buying, and stepped out into the sunshine feeling quite elated 9and quite a bit poorer).

Red shoes with flowers on the soles. I am such a rebel!


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